They really do have a legitimate claim on the taxpayers' money.

"We need leaders once again who can tap into that special blend of American confidence and optimism..."

Could it be that they actually want a hijacking so they can ask for more money next year?

Don't call back Congress; encourage them to stay out on vacation!

Evil can grow out of benevolent concepts and well-intentioned processes.

America has finally realized how biased the media is... and is calling for government regulation of fairness. Talk about snatching defeat from the jaws of victory!

When 80% of American voters are already furious about the illegal alien problem, one shudders to think of their reaction to news of a flood of deadly-disease-ridden aliens.

Going to prison because of a botched pool installation?

Don't hold your breath.

A federal judge is considering ordering immediate naturalization of would-be citizens, with no background investigations or document checks.