Hedgehog Voters

by Friendly Bear

Long ago, in the pre-Internet days, a friend's daughter wanted a hedgehog for a pet. For their privacy, I'll call the father "Tom" and his daughter "Hanna".

For many months, Hanna was obsessed with getting her pet hedgehog. Finally, Tom relented, and with the help of a local pet store, ordered a hedgehog for Hanna.

The hedgehog arrived and Tom presented it to Hanna in front of family and friends. Much to everyone's surprise, Hanna clearly was not thrilled with the hedgehog.

Finally, Tom asked Hanna, "You don't seem very happy with him, why is that?" Hanna, with a look of shock and disdain replied, "Well, I didn't know it was going to be a rodent!"

Despite evidence of significant voter fraud in the 2020 election, we have to admit that many people actually did vote for Biden and Harris. My neighborhood is very "blue", overwhelmingly supporting the pair.

After CNN declared Biden to be the next President, my neighbors were giddy. They were literally skipping up and down the streets, congratulating each other. One neighbor, a staunch supporter of the Democrat ticket, obtained professional-grade fireworks and began terrifying people and pets with thundering starbursts.

This seems in contrast to how the promised policies of President Biden may impact my neighbors. Many of my neighbors have careers in the software or biomedical fields, sure to be impacted by the expansion of salary-reducing H-1B visas.

Physicians and nurses also may find that their medical groups prefer to import cheaper employees. Already, x-rays and MRI's are often transmitted to countries like Bangladesh for cheaper doctors to read and analyze them. Other high-paying fields, such as engineering, will not be exempt from salary reductions either.

Before four years has passed, many Biden/Harris voters may come to regret their votes. They may suddenly realize that, like the hedgehog, the candidates of their dreams are in fact political rodents.

With their careers and dreams irreparably harmed, many Biden/Harris voters might then be described as Hedgehog Voters.